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Thursday, September 11, 2008
Degree Totting Woman, and a Man With None - Does Education Matter?
This was my response to a endowment selling who emailed me asking if it mattered that as a woman, she had a graduate degree and that the man she was dating did not. My anwser-verbatim.
Believe it or not, its not as simple as " a person with no degree, versus one who has" The dynamics are bigger than what meets the eye. Its a question of -are you simply compatible and if so, in what areas. Superboy depends on what you think is important. There are people who wear their degrees on their forehead like it makes them who they think they are. A degree on an unpolished person to me for instance, is a wash. Then there comes the question of what I think a polished person is.
A state worker or a blue collar worker can have a degree, so again, what one is therefore forced to think: What makes for compatibility?
What you think is compatible with you, solely is a list of things/traits/features/habits/idiosyncrasies that you need to see/feel/experience in your relationship. The luck of the draw in this area comes when you find those areas that you are compatible with, as far as the other person is concerned, in the same person. And where those traits are missing, you can "tolerate"/"compromise" etc.
This is what makes for compatibility, in my never- to- be- humble opinion: When you have someone that irrespective of their education, work experience is on the same page with Srewsegmpium (However you define being on the same page).
So, if the fact that a person does not have a degree bugs you now, it may bug you later. Its not a bad/good thing. It may be just that is on your list. Everything said here is relative. home owners insurance a person is "educated", but yet ignorant ( and I know a lot), of what use is that "education". At the end of the day, the dating process is the time for the individual top decide what it is they can and cannot live without. My father (most intelligent man in the world) once said, " As you met him, so he is". This meant- as you met the guy, that is who he is. He may want to change certain things on his own, he may not. What you see is what you get. It will behoove you not to try to change a person. That motivation to be a different person has to be intrinsic. He has to want it. The questions is- Is it important to you. Does it matter to you? Do you think it matters in his particular case or in general,do you feel one just needs to have a degree? There are some people who have a degree and you could not tell. There are some that do not have any, and are movers and shakers in our world.
To the question that asks can you be compatible with a less educated, blue collar or state worker? Its up to you. There are those that can and those that cannot. The issue is not the work/education, its the parties involved and what they deem important.
Eno Georgette Inwek, author.
Posted by hedrvb | 7:33 AM | E-mail this post 
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